November Thanks: Day 2-Growth

"Do not take anything for granted- not one smile or person or one rainbow or one breath, or one night in your cozy bed." -Terry Guillemets

Last year I did a little feature on my blog dedicated to all things I am grateful for.  This year I plan on doing the same, with more gravitas and enthusiasm, and much more writing.

So as the first post in my November Thanks series, I want to start off with being grateful for one thing at a time.  Tonight, this is what I am grateful for:

GROWTH

This time last year, I was in a totally and completely different place.   Happy?  Indeed.  Content with myself?  Not so much.  These are things I am definitely not afraid to share, as obviously I write about what is on my mind and my life as much as possible.  With each new year, new things occur to me that are valuable and have meaning to the woman that I am.

If we all just stayed the same, year after year, then what kind of people would we be?  If we never experienced growth and letting go, then who would we be as well?  These are questions I am always asking myself and nowadays I am choosing to do more and talk less (as best as I can). 

I am thankful for the growth I have made in the past year, two years, six years, 10 years.  I'm grateful for the efforts I have made, even at times when I believed I wasn't doing enough.  I am thankful that all I have ever done is continued to move forward, despite any and all obstacles that get in my way.  And I am grateful that in the process of continual growth, I am discovering the things that I can let go of (insecurity, an incessant need for approval, caring about what people think of me or my life, trying to fix it all or assume I have to, worrying over nothing, talking just for the sake of talking, not following through, and not being able to handle stress in a healthy manner) and no longer need to carry on my shoulders.

Growth has been something that has helped to guide me in the right direction and although I have stumbled and fallen back from time to time, my efforts in welcoming growth and change, prove to me just how strong of a person and woman I truly am.

The struggles I have overcome and the heartache that once burdened me so deeply, have nowadays, opened my heart to all the good that is MY LIFE.  And I honestly, never want to stop growing up.  I never want to stop learning and bettering myself, and I never want to stop letting the good in.

By welcoming growth, I welcome the woman I am, my one true self.  I've learned of the people who will always stand beside me, even in moments of despair and weakness, and it is they (they know who they are) who create more good in my life.  With growth and good, comes happiness and fulfillment, and I am both of these.

I am aware that there will always be days when I feel blah, but I welcome those days and emotions, instead of trying to fight them too much.  Life is not always all good and all bad, it is simply a mixture of the two, and it is up to each individual to decide how to balance them out.

I do my best for the most part to balance them naturally and effortlessly.  Sometimes PMS makes things worse, but c'est la vie.  I am a woman.  I have MANY emotions and hormones.  I can't change that.  And I no longer want to change those things anymore.  I am who I am.  I accept who I am.  But, I won't and don't accept when I prevent myself from being true to who I am.  When I don't let growth in.

That is the difference and that is what I hold close to my heart.

Tonight I am grateful for all the growth I've made not only as an individual, but in all aspects of my life.  I don't think I'm perfect.  I know that I have my flaws and I know that sometimes those flaws get in the way and cause irritation in my daily life and with those I love. 

But that is the thing about love.  Love accepts growth.  It accepts change.  It accepts flaws.  It only loves and strives to show the beauty in all. 

On this November 2 night, growth has been a beacon of strength for me.  It has helped me to arrive in the best place I am in, with full hope and knowledge, that I am on the right path.  I am accepted.  I am loved. 

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