My World.

"I like living.  I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing."-Agatha Christie

I got this image via Google.....but in my world, this is what surrounds me. Beautiful tall trees, with light shining through, just enough to make a path for me to find way.  In my world, there is peace and tranquility, love and devotion, happiness and freedom, confidence and bravery, hope and faith, and above all, there is light. 
Sometimes life becomes this everyday mundane thing, something we must all get up in the morning to do all over again.  And sometimes life gets boring. Hell, everything gets boring at some point or another.  But...the secret to life is that we must always live it for today and never live it for tomorrow.  At times when I feel like giving up and hibernating for months, I quickly realize that when I stop to take a breath and just relax....all the stresses and annoyances that sometimes creep its way into my inner self, disappear.  Is it ever hard for you to relax? 

Today my life consists of my own world, one in which happiness and love do exist. One in which I am constantly learning about myself and loving myself a lot more.  I read so many blogs on here and they inspire me.  They touch my heart and bring me back to reality.  Its so easy to think that our lives are harder than others, until you come across those whose lives are truly a lot harder than ours. 

In my 24 years, I've seen a lot of people I love, die.  I've seen the sadness and heartache and pain and sorrow that it brings, and to be quite honest, I kinda hate it.  But if death and loss have taught me anything, its that it truly makes you stronger.  The other night I had a dream.  Some nights I do meditation and it really works and relaxes me instantly.  When I was traveling into my subconscious world, I saw someone I hadn't seen in years. I saw my grandmother.  Clear as day there she was and she told me things that really made me think.  Although in a dream..she told me to let go of all the things I fear and to just be me.  To know that everything was going to turn out just fine and to be stronger.  When I awoke, I cried.  In my dream she was so real, her touch so vivid and her voice so much alive.  I knew then, that after 5 years of not having her in my life, that she was still in some way or another, watching over me. 

I am finding more and more peace within myself and more and more love as well.  It's crazy to think that love can grow, even after so long, but for me, its growing more and more day by day.  I feared love forever, even when I knew how much I loved certain people.  I always had a guard up..until I realized that fearing love means fearing life. I love my guy tremendously and God am I lucky.  I love my family immensely and God how lucky I am again.  Tonight I am happy.  I am content.  I am above all things, in love with life.